The more I look around, the more I realize that we might be on of the biggest tribe animals on this planet. Going outside of the tribe, and being a lonely wolf, can be scary.
Being a part of a tribe was a good thing back in 10.000 BC. Because the only thing we were worrying about was the following:
- Will it kill me?
- Can I eat it?
- Can I fuck it?
Our brains still has this way of thinking. That’s why we end up following the tribe. Because it will be easier to kill, eat and raise a child if we are in a tribe out in the nature, trying to survive.
Things Happens Outside of the Tribe
The thing is. If we follow a tribe, our lives will end up like the tribe. Which would be awesome if we daily feared for our lives. The tribe would have our backs.
But in a modern society, where tigers are locked up in cages at the local zoo, our meal is just around the corner and the kid is at the kindergarten. There is no reason to be a in tribe.
The modern (average) tribe will do the following:
- Get an education
- Have some student debt
- Work from 9-5 for 50 years
- Have some kids they don’t have time for
- Eat +3 meals a day, and be overweight
- Get divorced
And the tribe do so, because that is how we define a prosperous life.
If we step outside of this tribe, new windows will open. But the entire tribe will tell you how the tiger is going to kill when we are on our own. Because that is how our brain works.
How I Step Outside of the Tribe
Here are 4 things I do, which is “unusual” for the tribe.
Not Having a Mobile
I have never been more present social than I’m right now. And that’s because I don’t have a mobile.
The thing is. The people who are closest to me, is getting more and more pissed about me not having a mobile. Because they can’t contact me when they feel like it. They do not pay attention to how I devote 100 % of my time to them, whenever I’m with them.
That is called Loss Aversion.
Loss aversion is the fact we find it more painful to lose 100 $, than the joy of finding 200 $.
People are hardly noticing me not looking at my mobile every 10-15 minutes, but are super pissed about that one minute every 14 days that they can’t get in contact with me.
And that is why “the tribe” is keep telling me to get a mobile.
Eating 1-2 Meals a Day
Eating is a very social thing. Whenever I tell people that I’m not having lunch today, they are about to fall down from the chair.
If we say that we spend around 45 minutes prepping, eating and cleaning after each meal. We then devote 2 hours 15 minutes consuming calories each day.
Eating less frequent is one of the most awesome habits I do and has several benefits:
- Saving time = more productivity
- Saving money
- Eating healthier
- Eat as much as I like
- Drinking more water
- Clearer skin
- Staying healthy and lean
Saving + 50 % of My Income
When I tell people about me chasing FIRE. People often understand it. But will never try to do it themselves.
I’m still trying to figure out what they are fearing. The conclusion so far is that people is so scared of stepping outside of the tribe. Just the thought of “losing” money in the stock market, is enough for them to stay in the comfort zone, and not leaving (just for period) a job they don’t feel like.
And they focus more on the “Spending less” than they focus on the “Do what you want” part of the equation. Which again is a Loss Aversion thing.
My mind can’t grasp the idea of people showing up at a job for 50 years if they could do whatever they felt like. If we could cherry pick activities without worrying about our finances, I can’t imagine that we would live the way we do now.
Don’t get me wrong. I don’t think that people will do well sitting in hammock. But the solution is not how we are living our lives now.
The ambition of not wanting to own stuff is still super weird to many people.
It seems like there is an equivalent of how many things we have and how happy/successful we are.
Which is not my reality.
I believe in presence and empathy, which can be done for free without gifts or other stuff.